Casting Shadows

Posted on November 21, 2019 by

33 Comments

Cypress bows in autumn rain
Bearing weight as if in pain
Casting shades on what remains
Fury of the storm unrestrained
As limbs of trees lay broken, felled.
Thunderclouds gather, striking fear
Roosting birds take wing, disappear
Sensing the change in atmosphere
As a once calm wind heaved and swelled.

©2021 Linda Lee Lyberg

Written for dVerse where Frank is hosting ‘Imitation Practice’. I’m not sure how well I did as far as the meter goes, but I gave it a shot. The rhyme scheme is AAAABCCCB.

Author’s Note: I’ve got rain on the brain. It’s rained for three days, which is unusual for us here in Arizona. I’m not complaining; we really needed it. And I do love the freshness it brings.

Category: PoetryTags: , ,

33 Comments on “Casting Shadows”

  2. Very nice description of the wind especially with the last line of it heaving and swelling. I also like how the cypress bears wet weight as if in pain. Nice imitation of Tennyson.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  4. You were wondering about the meter, and I think if you’re after the Tennyson rhythm you need to take out a few words to get the lines to four beats, like ‘low’ then ‘wet’ and if you change ‘shadows’ to ‘shades’ that scans. If I had a metronome I’d use it to get the beat, but I don’t so I tap out the rhythm as I say the lines. It’s tricky!

    Like

    Reply

  5. I certainly could tell it was Tennyson, even before I got to your explication.It fares well when read aloud. Nice job of modernizing the form too.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  8. Tennyson seems to be the one to imitate today. The rhythm needs a bit of changing as Jane says otherwise, it is a beautiful poem. You did good! I so love the way you describe the thunderstorm and the rain.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  13. There are a couple of comments about the rhythm, and I see what they mean. The rhyme scheme works well, though, and as a poem it stands up in its own right. The slight softening of the rhythm works with the topic, and your imagery is great.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

Leave a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 7,328 other subscribers
Follow Charmed Chaos on WordPress.com
JUST RELEASED!
JUST RELEASED!
Bartender at
Barista at Go Dog Go Cafe
Archives
Awards Top 20 Short Story Blog
POETS CORNER
Translate
Read the Printed Word!
Copyright©2017-2025

© Linda Lee Lyberg and Charmed Chaos. 2017-2025. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Linda Lee Lyberg and Charmed Chaos with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

The Write Idea, LLC  DBA Charmed Chaos- Mesa, AZ USA