Let Go

AUTHOR”S NOTE: Three years ago today, I wrote this and I still find myself on an incredible journey of self discovery. Thank you to all who have taken the time to read and comment on my posts. You’ve encouraged me through it all!


tied_to_the_tracks_by_12burnyou
I have let go of my old life. You know the one. The life where I got up earlier than God, rushed,rushed,rushed. Worked all day, and part of the night. Jetted to somewhere different, worked in a different location, a different city. Encountered harshness no matter where I was. There is little chivalry in an airport. Each man or woman fighting for their own space. Seldom reaching out a hand to help. And if you reach out to help, they view you as a suspicious character. Same song, second verse. Rinse and repeat.
 
Exhausted. Tired to the core of my being; all the time. So much so I spent the weekends recovering, from what I am not sure. Perhaps it was the disenchantment of viewing life from where I was and what I had become. I could never catch up, or feel like my world is right.
Living my life in constant motion, a flickering monochromatic silent movie. No one knows me. Who is this person I see in the mirror? I do not recognize her. A sepia inked version of me staring back, with flashes of color of the woman I once was, pleading to me for change like a beggar on the street.

It worked for a while. But then it didn’t. It doesn’t matter where or when or even how everything changed for me. What does matter is it did.
And now?
I spend my days contemplating life and its meaning. I pray, I meditate, and I am centered. I have the love of not only a good man but a good dog too.
I observe the world around me and see it again in all its kaleidoscopic beauty. I watch a momma sparrow outside my window feed her baby, who has discovered he has the gift of flight. I watch the white butterflies fluttering in the wind, beckoning me forward to this new life. Giving me permission to be true to me.
I have the universe in my meditation room, encouraging me to soar,soar, soar- you are free at last. I have my garden, my art, my poetry, my writing where I search for and sometimes find the real essence of me.  For the first time ever, it’s within my grasp to be true to who I am.
I listen and God speaks to my soul for he is now in control. He was always there, but I was not always listening.
Rainbows in my room and on my soul.
Hello, I am Linda Lee. It’s good to be back.
I have Let Go.

 

Copyright©2017
Linda Lee Lyberg

Linda Lee Lyberg is a wife, mother, artist, published poet and author. She resides in Mesa, AZ with her husband Pete (aka The Big Viking) of 23 years, and her dog, Ricky Bobby. Linda writes various forms of poetry, as well as short stories. You can read more of her works at: charmedchaos.com
and on her Amazon Author Page

8 Comments on “Let Go

  1. I can so relate to this as we did share the same kind of life for a while. Since I have retired, I am still getting to know me and you have inspired me to write down things that mean a lot to me. This is your legacy, your words.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. We have traveled similar but very different paths. I believe it is harder for women to find themselves because they must first climb out of the definition (womb) given them by a patriarchy steeped in “logical” superstition. Meaning the fear of our ability to create human life. So, he decided to control rather than be a true helpmate. I am glad that your marriage is a good one and that it allowed you to flourish and find the real you. And congratulate you on doing so. It is the hardest task we are given, but the one that brings the most rewards. Hats off to you!!!

    Elizabeth

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Elizabeth. It took a few tries at the husband/wife relationship, but I finally found the right one. Thank you for your lovely thoughts.

      Like

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